'Zoot Rules!'
To
help
English speakers learn Dutch, Calidocious Inc® proposes a simplified way to use Dutch personal pronouns. Nicknames for this
modified style of Dutch (using Flemish pronunciation) are 'California', or 'Sideways' Dutch, or simply
'C-Z' ('Calidocious and Zoot').
In Dutch, pronouns change depending on whether they are stressed or unstressed.
For
example, the word for "You" is sometimes "jij" and
sometimes "je". It is difficult for English speakers to know
when to use which option, particularly after the verb.
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In 'C-Z', however, the unstressed variant of the pronoun never precedes the verb. Conversely, the stressed variant never follows the verb, except when the trailing pronoun needs special emphasis.
'To further simplify 'C-Z', several potentially confusing homonym pronouns are replaced with distinct pronouns. These 'new' pronouns come from spoken Dutch dialects.
Several unstable object
and possessive pronouns are regularized in the same way. The intermittently used weak forms of
Direct Object pronouns and Possessive pronouns are
dropped altogether.
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Zooth of Zoot- Rhodin at Stanford U. |
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'Easy Button'- Staples office supplies. |
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| To make it easier for English speakers to master the songbird-like cadence of Flemish, several double-syllable pronouns are replaced with
single-syllable pronouns from regional dialects.
As a result of these changes, each of the pronouns seems to
"lay back" following the verb. This phenomenon gives rise to the nickname
"Sideways Dutch©".
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To help clarify the pronunciation of pronouns, 'Zoot' reintroduces several
old fashioned Dutch spellings as pronunciation hints.
'Gh' is reintroduced to represent the Flemish variant of guttural 'g' which includes a supplemental soft 'r' trill.
'Final y' is reintroduced to indicate the sound of "eh", as in 'bed', as opposed to the schwa sound of 'the'.
'W' after a vowel is used to indicate a long vowel.
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'Faster, Lighter- Cheeper'- after NASA |
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Advanced Pronunciation Tips |
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'Ij', as a compressed, lowercase, letter, is reused to represent a long 'i'
sound before "r" or in the "lijk" suffix. It represents an "oyj" sound at the end of a syllable. "Compressed ij" can be found in the 'Special Characters' kits
of most "Times" fonts. An example is the 'ij' in the word "mogelijk". The nickname for this letter is the "Marin IJ".
Credit
is due to the Afrikaans language for the
spellings of 'ek', 'ons', and 'jy', and to Darwin, for his Finch sketch.
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'Sideways Dutch'© Pronouns English Before the Verb After the Verb
I ik 'k or ek ('e' is barely pronounced) We wij* ons You (s) informal jij jy You (pl) informal ghij** gy You (s&pl) formal u u He hij hij or 'ie She zij zie They zij zie
Additional pronouns include:
English Reflexive Object Possessive
I mij mij mijn We ons ons owns/onze You (s) Inf, jou jou jouw You (p) Inf, dijr*** dijr oijer (Limburgs 'd'r'/ 'eur') You (s&p) For. zich u uw He/It zich hem zijn Her zich haar haar They zich hen hun
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Stanford 'Pronoun Tree'- Art Thompson |
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Flemish Lingust Simon Stevin |
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| Notes: * - In conversation, pronouns ending in "-ij" can be condensed to "-e" (pronounced 'wuh') to increase speed.
** - The verbs for ghij/gy are the same as those for Flemish "Gij".
The present tense of 'to be' is written as "zijdt" and the past tense
as 'war'. ***- This is meant to look like the "Compressed
-ij" available in 'Microsoft Word Times', 'Apple Pages Times', etc..
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Calidocious |
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| To complete the "Californization" of Dutch, ie. make it more
'burgundian', Zoot employs "Standard High Flemish" pronunciation.
"Standard High Flemish" is the style of pronunciation used by
commentators on Flemish TV. It can both
be described as Dutch spoken with a French/Cockney accent.
This soft accent, together with the pattering rhythm of Flemish, make the language sound somewhat like the chirping of Canaries (Finches). A good way to 'get the hang' of spoken Flemish, is to try and mimic an almost weightless, and very agile, Finch.
Another pronunciation tip is to try and make one's speach sound as juicy, tart, and firm as a fresh plum.
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Zoot |
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Honorable Mention is due to Simon Stevin of Flanders was a
pioneering scientist and linguist in the 16th century who logically
'proved' Adam and Eve must have spoken Flemish, since it was the finest
language on earth!. Stevin's 'theorem' is an inspiration for Calidocious® Inc.. Thanks is due too, to Cervantes, for his characters Don Quixote and Sancho Panza, who serve as role models.
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New Amsterdam Theater- "As C-Z as A,B,C!" |
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